Goodbye to Cush

So I kinda thought I'd get away with having a cush life. I mean, my life is far from perfect. I have as many problems as the next gal, but I have made a point to distance myself from difficult situations and especially difficult people. You see, I'm the Queen of boundaries. In my early years, I was the world's biggest pushover so learning healthy boundaries was a huge step for a bleeding heart like myself. But over time, as more responsibility and demands were put on me, I made a point to distance myself from chaos. And God let me get away with it for a while. But He loves me too much to let me stay cozy. As of late, He's decided it's time to get working....On me, that is. One thing I'm learning about people is that you can't change them. This may sound so simple to most people, but it's a very hard concept for a Type A, Control Freak like myself to swallow. My Daddy reminded me the other day that it isn't me that should be molding people to my image. And OMG did that make me realize how arrogant I am. The more I let his words sink in, the more I realized that maybe difficult people were part of MY molding process. When I say difficult people, I don't mean there's anything wrong with them. I'm talking about people who challenge me. People who are different than me. Patience pushers. Heck, I'm probably someone's difficult person! I still believe in healthy boundaries. But God's been teaching me that while physical boundaries are absolutely appropriate, there are NO...I repeat...NO boundaries with love and grace. This is where my cush life became uncomfy. As I reflect on God's word, I realize that Jesus loved the unlovely. He surrounded Himself with the hard to love.  He didn't try to change anyone with intimidating Scripture and intimidation. He showered them with love and grace. He didn't live a cush life....why? Because He had One purpose. And my choosing to follow Christ means I have one purpose as well. So long cush...hello glory!

THE MOUTH

One of the hardest things about being a Mommy is shaping up! And I'm not talking about chiseling my now flabby stomach....I'm talking about whiting out those gray areas in my life.. eliminating those areas that I've allowed to go lax. After all, how can I teach my son godliness if I'm not striving to live that way in every area of my life? As I plunge further into my James Bible Study (a la Beth Moore), I have a new conviction of my mouth. You see, my mouth is big. Huge. Gi-normous. They say that your skin is your biggest organ....well, my mouth is my biggest organ! It's truly my biggest gift and my biggest curse. And the book of James reminds me just how evil it can be. I've always known not to talk bad about people. I've never been one to be two-faced or to spread rumors with malicious intent. But I am a nosy person. I love a good tabloid magazine and being the first to know "news." And how guilty am I of "venting" and saying things I'd "say to their face." Can we say rationalization? These things make me no different then two-faced, malicious, gossips! This all hit home recently when I found out someone was talking about me. They weren't saying awful things about my character. They were speaking about my life, saying things they knew nothing about. And as much as I tell myself I don't care what people thing about me, it bothered me. I mean, who are they to speak about my life? I'll say it again with a different perspective....WHO AM I TO SPEAK ABOUT SOMEONE ELSE'S LIFE? A friend of mine posted an acronym on her Facebook page that is truth to live by. She said to THINK. Before speaking, I need to ponder if what I say is:
 T-truthful, H-helpful, I-inspiring, N-necessary, K-kind. Wow. I would do my best not to ever talk again! But in all seriousness, how can I teach my son to act like Jesus if he hears his Mama gossiping on her cell phone all day? This may sound pretty dramatic, but Satan has his claws in gossips. They spread so much evil and are the source of nothing but bad. They break up churches, friendships, marriages. And as fun as it is to be in the know about everything (because I tend to be THAT nosy), it's time to grow up. To godly up! So I rest in this....Jesus was perfect in every way and you never once see Him in Scripture trying to defend himself. He never felt the need to explain His character. Why? Because He knew who He was. You never once saw Jesus "venting" to the disciples or "saying things He would say to other people's faces." Why? Because He wasn't insecure. He had no need to be "in the know" of everyone else's life. He had one purpose on this earth and didn't have time to listen, defend or take part in any gossip of any kind. You see, I don't want Satan to have his claws in me, using me to spread evil. I don't want to reek of insecurity and waste time trying to explain myself to other people. I don't want to waste time talking about others and pretending like I know something I know zilch about, I want to leave behind the fragrance of Christ. And I want to raise my son to be like Jesus.

Proverbs 16:28 A perverse man stirs up dissension, and a gossip separates close friends.